A Reflection on Human Needs & Human Strategies
October was “mental health awareness” month and Sabina Fila, clinical social worker and psychotherapist, reflects on human needs and human strategies, and how her profession dovetails with her role as volunteer and spiritual mentor at Thrive for Life Prison Project.
I (Sabina) started to volunteer at Thrive right at the beginning. Zach had a vision of bringing our presence and care and the Spiritual Exercises to the prisons and jails, and we started on this beautiful journey.
When we bring a spiritual retreat to the prison we want to address 3 things:
safety
love and care
openness to spiritual growth
First and foremost we want to create an environment of safety. We do that by bringing our full self and meeting the full self of the other.
We are not “the experts” or “the teachers”, and they are not “the inmates”, we are all fellow human beings, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, people who have experienced suffering and joy, and when human beings meet from that space of humility, honesty, and genuine curiosity, there is safety.
We have often heard people say “it is the first time that I feel treated and seen as a human being”.
Love and care are another very basic need that we all share, across cultures and contexts. What we hold dear is the preciousness of each life and in the sharing of our faith the deep knowledge of the immense love of God for each and everyone of us. Part of reclaiming love and care is of course our relationship to ourselves, being able to welcome all of who we are, self forgiveness. Concrete representations of this shared love and care in the retreats are the moments of sharing a meal, singing together, laughing, and crying.
Through a combination of the time shared and reflection, we ultimately want to help each other in reconnecting to our purpose. The outcome of all of this is much richness, deepening of community and connections, and growth of our faith, no matter where we are, no matter the circumstances, each in their own way.
Transitioning out of prison, going back to family, community, life on the outside can be a huge endeavor. There are many variables, the trauma and length of incarceration, the contacts maintained with family and friends while incarcerated, the inborn strengths and challenges of one’s character and personality, the skills, capacity, and emotional maturity acquired before and during the incarceration.
Unfortunately in our historical and geographical context there is not enough attention given to reentry, preparing people for the transitions and / or accompanying them on the outside. (You had this person for 30 years in your prisons as a captive audience…you could not offer more preparation for the future, really?)
Going back to mental health, what comes into play at that point is the strategies of survival that people have developed during their time of incarceration.
From my experience with incarcerated or formerly incarcerated people, some of the most common strategies one has to develop in that circumstance are:
self reliance
healthy suspiciousness
a way to shut down your needs and desires
learn to comply or rebel in relationships/social situation
We humans have a great capacity to adapt to the most challenging situations, and since very young, our system learns to find strategies of dealing with ourselves, others and the worlds that help us face or overcome what comes our way.
As a clinical social worker, psychotherapist, volunteer, and spiritual mentor, I am both inspired and motivated to do more to shape a positive path forward when I witness the resilience and adaptability of the human spirit.